Maybe this is a metropolitan thing, but when you go out, you almost trip over small white envelopes. A bump, a line, it's completely normal. After some research, it turns out that 30% of cocaine is snorted in Amsterdam. An estimated 10 kg is snorted daily in the Netherlands…. Young men and highly educated individuals are particularly fond of it.
A good acquaintance of mine even had to draw up a company policy to ban coke during drinks and parties. How insane is that? My dear nose did not come out of my 'party hard' period sacred or unscathed. Praise the Lord that no addiction came out of it. But what is so alluring about coke? And why do we, en masse, do something that seems so grotesquely idiotic to most people: snorting a powder! HARD. DRUGS!
The main USP is, of course, that it perks you up when you've had too much to drink. Then you can continue (drinking) for a few more hours. Yet I think there's more to it than that, because otherwise speed would have been number one, that's really Martian powder... #neversleepagain
Drinks, drinks, drinks, watch out: here come the feelings!
Coke, you see, blows up the dam you've built around your feelings. It eliminates those East German border posts guarding your emotions. Cocaine pushes an irresistible urge for deep conversations about your issues and feelings. The toughest, most resilient guys, the silverback gorillas and macho entrepreneurs suddenly talk about their difficult relationship with their mother, the grief over an ex, or their struggles with their employer and the pressure they feel.
Oh lord, those emotions. Working hard all week, not showing weakness and persevering. We all look at new alpha male role models like Andrew Tate and tough football warriors who ferociously beat their chests after scoring a goal. That's masculine. But talking about your emotions and feelings? Pussy!
It remains a challenge. Because no matter how tough and resilient you are. No matter how persistent that voice in your head is that tells you not to be a bitch and that emotions are for women… Those feelings will surface when the tide, no matter what, will wash salt water into your face. And if we don't address them, they will become rotten, stinking cysts that lead to burnouts or worse…
That alcohol and coke are the way to loosen up and talk about feelings with your friends in that manner is a deep problem from which we must free ourselves. That drugs can sometimes help to clear certain issues is totally fine, but the root cause remains.
That image of the unyielding, tough man who never cries is the standard. We need to work on that. I once made an art collection about it, tough figures like Batman saying something vulnerable. Perhaps my own way of showing emotions.
As men, we need to learn to be vulnerable, and women also need to give men the chance to show that vulnerability. Even if it perhaps doesn't align with their need and image of that always quiet strength. Perhaps even pushing to break down those emotional border posts without having to use 'smurf posts' aka white envelopes.
Check out the art collection here.